Perhaps you’d be amazing

 I was muffling sounds in my pillow when I heard the knock on the the door. 

I wiped my tears and quickly put on my pink top. Hey, said my neighbor. 

The door was opened, I thought to check on you. I smiled. 

Oh, I left the door open, but I dare not say. 

As she walked away, I smiled.

 When I could no longer hear her footsteps, I slowly sat on my bed. 

I was thinking of leaving, but I wanted you to find me early. 

There is an emptiness on the inside of me, I can’t kill it by staying. 

But I love the way you bring me meals and say nice words to me. 

The way you pick up my packages and tell me there is reason to live.

 I barely return this love, I don’t know how to do so, except by leaving little I love you notes with candy by the side. 

You remind me of when the world was against me. 

Of when something called pains was killing me. 

You are love, redefined. 

So, I am here, thinking of what would happen if I had choked myself to death.

 Because of you, I will start again tomorrow. I will strive to be better. 

I don’t want you to grieve. I want to laugh at the language you speak.

 The tiny whispers of you asking me where I have been. I am wondering how long it would take to say I am fine. 

However way, your love is why death won’t quickly do us part. 

Dedicated to every heart with the act of kindness.