Future

 

Look at our past ahead of us. 

Isn’t this place where we first found love? 

Yet, every time that I remember you, all I see is hurt. 

I know that I once went round in circle, hoping that one day you’d return my words. 

I promise I didn’t make anything up, I was so into you that I named you my world.

And it was like that with everyone that came after you.

There is a part of me with everyone, I know that I don’t say much, but I promise that I am scarred.

And the thoughts of you breaks my heart. 

And there is my future, how do I explain?

That I can no longer feature in happiness or change. 

I am just here knowing that time won’t change anything except the days and my age. 

I am like the best friend of fate. 

I am broken. 

There used to be a part of me that was excited about dreams.

Now, there is half of you contained in me, all I have are memories of we. 

There is no future, you took it. 

99 different wishes, half is that I don’t see tomorrow. 

Because my heart bears too heavy a grief that I don’t want to know what tomorrow brings. 

It’s not supposed to be like this. 

I once had my hope redeemed. 

But then, I end up remembering that you were supposed to protect me.

But with your hands, my clothes you ripped and watched your friends take turns on me. 

Now, there is no me. Because all I have is the image of when I was ripped apart by the one that ought to get my back. 

I haven’t lived in reality. It’s been 15 years and more, I still think of it. 

I wasn’t supposed to be torn by you. 

So, it’s been 15 years of hoping tomorrow doesn’t come and my past can leave. 

There should be a future, but I dare not imagine one with my scars and hurts. 

My eyes don’t even shut, these nightmares takes my world. 

It wasn’t the fact that I met you. 

It was the fact that I trusted you. 

In breaking me, you broke all I could ever be.