Maybe Love isn’t my thing

 I used to love you yesterday, then I woke up and didn’t love you anymore.

I used to want you so much, that I couldn’t explain how I stopped desiring you.

It used to feel like my life was in you.

I used to wait to do life with you. 

I can’t explain,  I don’t want to try.

I am wondering how many times I have to fall in love with you. 

Like how often do I need the thoughts of you?

And I am wondering how many times you desire me. 

This time of the night is when I love to love you. 

When my soul is scarred and my heart is vulnerable. 

I can’t understand. 

I want to ask. 

Do I look stupid when I smile? 

When I fall in love, do I look mad? 

Because I have been wondering, why does it look crazy. 

And so scary. 

And I want to be sorry and love isn’t my thing.

But I am looking to love you till forever, yet my heart tends to leave. 

How do I stay in love with we? 

How much of me do you keep? 

Just maybe love isn’t a thing.